The Art of Giving

Yesterday I was walking into a Panera where a woman asked me for some change. I didn't have any so I offered to buy her something from Panera. When asked what she wanted she responded " a steak sandwich and a soda." My first thought was " whoa... I was thinking a bagel." However, I agreed and bought her the sandwich and soda. As I handed it to her a man from across the parking lot, who turned out to be her long term friend, said " That was really sweet. I've known her since I was in elementary school and she is a really good person." 

It was in that moment, and the many moments after, that I realized how jaded and blind by my privilege I am sometimes. In that moment I had totally forgotten, SHE IS A PERSON. I was annoyed that this woman for answering my question honestly of what she wanted. This woman who is at the mercy of strangers, and organizations, that provide what they can, and she must take what is given because she is viewed as "in need" and therefore beggars can't be choosers. 

In this moment I realized that there are so many stigmas and individualized programmed responses that I have adopted consciously and unconsciously. I'm happy I gave her that choice, a choice to dictate her "wants" not her "needs." Every human should have the ability to have a choice, even in something that to some of us is such a simplistic seemingly minute choice. 

I called this post the art of giving because the truth is it is an art. We give in different ways to different people, and sometimes we are exceptionally talented at it, while other times we stumble to say or do the "right" thing. When we do give financially it is a coin in a cup, and a feeling that we have done "enough."  

Before I go any further I want to make it clear that this is not a political thing, it is a human thing. We are all in this together, we have all had hard times, and sometimes just need someone to show us the kindness that will get us through to tomorrow. God did not place us here to exist like passing ships, but to be a support when others are falling, because we need support when we are falling. What an outstanding demonstration of faith, trust and love to sit with another that the world has cast aside. What an outstanding protest to challenge society, and make them take off their blinders, to see the story, to see the person. 


I want to challenge myself and my readers to do two things:

1.  The next time you give to a person who is experiencing homelessness don't just put the coin in the cup, but ask them how they are and really mean it. Talk to them like you talk to the person at your coffee shop or walking into your office. Talk to them like a human because that is what they are.

2. Start seeing the person behind the stigma 

Until next time... signing off from sunny St. Louis